MST1 Zem's Backstory
by ThreeFacedMelissa
Summary: My first MST! Warning: Writing is pretty god awful on the Authors part.


Hi friends! Jir here! So I bet you all know about Zem. If you don't you should probably check it out. So for sometime now I have been checking on what sorts of things Zem posts, because it's rather insane. But today I came across Zem's backstory, and I had just WAY too many opinions to not try and MST this. This is my first MST so please excuse me if It's shitty, also, I mean no offense to Zem, but this is a little bit much.

So now that that's over I'm going to MST this thing.

**you guy think you know zem's back-story but you don't let me tell you the HOLE back ground story- **

Hole background story? I wasn't aware of this hole situation. Did Zem fall into a pit as a smeet? That would explain a lot.

**zem is technically the first blue eye irken to be born ( even thou there's A LOT of blue i irken's )**

Actually blue eyed Irken are completely fanon. I should know as my main o.c has them, but only because I really like blue, otherwise I would've kept with canon.

**And i'll you why zem is the technically the first blue eye irken to be born its started over during irken Egyptian time,**

First off. I think Zem accidentally that sentence, secondly "Irken Egyptian Time"? I must have missed that in the History of Irk Textbook.

**in the irken Egyptian ascription said i blue eye irken girl or boy will one day be born and Gide us to VICTORY sweet victory with her or his army with blue eyes**

I'd like to think "Said I blue eye Irken Girl or boy" was a typo, but "I" and "A" are on complete opposite sides of the keyboard.

Also, Irken's aren't born, they're cloned, but knowing Zem she ignored that.

I'm also wondering if this army includes my Irken? I'm hoping not.

**as well for the irken empire and bring then one day the first blue eye irken baby was born they named her zeemmy (a.k.a zem, that name means the power of gods)**

Had to read this sentence over 5 times before I realized she probably meant "Her blue eyed army, as well as the Irken Empire and Brought them. Then one day the first blue eyed Irken baby was born". Punctuation is your friend Zem.

Also "Power of Gods"? First off, I highly doubt that Irkens have any sort of religion, as God is often referred to as "A _Higher_ Power" That would probably highly offend The Tallest. Secondly, even if there is a alleged "Prophecy" calling a child that may lead them to grow up to be an arrogant jerk.

Also. I think stating how tall this kid is might be notable? That high a title wouldn't be given to a short irken.

**then after zem the first was born more and more blue eye irkens started to be born...but then one day when zem the first was about to be knighted as the new tallest... something bad happen... zem the first got kidnap and so did the rest of her family and the blue eye irkens...**

There are _Way_ too many things wrong with this sentance.

1. _Why_ is she that tall? I mean honestly that kid should've been killed by The Tallest immediately.

2. You don't get "Knighted" Tallest. I really doubt it's anything too formal or ceremonious.

3. If she IS becoming a Tallest, WHERE ARE THE GUARDS? You'd think Kidnapping a Tallest, plus a big group of people who were probably with her would be near impossible, considering the fleets of Spittle Runners and number of guards always guarding the Tallest in canon.

4. IRKENS DON'T HAVE FAMILIES.

**a couple years later zem the 2 was born when zem the second was born the blue eye irkens started to come but it seems to be going well Intel one day when she was getting fight at skool and there was a price of being the rear blue eye irken...when the bully punch zem the second in the face she unleash a power like no other the that power was "angry level 5" she turned into a BIG HORRIBLE MONSTER LIKE NO OTHER every one ran away from the monster**

Zem. it's either "Zem the 2nd" or "Zem 2" You can't have both.

Somebody please explain me what a Electronics company has the do with Zem getting beat up at the _Academy_?

I'd like to once again point out that Zem is neglecting punctuation, because

"Intel one day when she was getting fight at skool and there was a price of being the rear blue eye irken"

Despite the obvious spelling errors, would read better as

"Intel one day, when she was getting **in a** fight at skool. "

"There was a price of being the rear blue eye irken-"

Or even having this come before the explanation of the situation.

"Angry level 5" made me laugh, but because it's silly, not because it's funny.

This "fact" brings into question how my blue eyed Irken could ever lose, maybe she forgot she could do that?

**when her parents saw what happen they got the one thing that will calm down zem the second ( don't laugh at this part) he baby blanket it calms he down and turns her back normal**

IRKENS DON'T HAVE PARENTS!

Also, really Zem? I know you're trying to defend your own silly idea, but a author's note in the middle?

I'm beginning to question Zem's gender, as the pronoun "he" was used twice.

**but she acts like a baby (for zem the first is her baby rattle and zem the second is her baby blanket for zem is her baby pacifier) but the same thing happen the zem the second when she got kidnap when she was about to be knighted to be the tallest and more and more blue eye irkens started to vanish again...**

If you figure out what this paragraph is supposed to mean, please enlighten me.

**then when zem the third was ( you know zem)**

Yes this is the part where we actually get to the infamous Zem we all know. Also considering the next part of this sentence is "Ever" I think that authors note overwhelmed Zem's brain and she lost her train of though.

**ever one was shocked the first blue eye irken was born again over 100 years**

Considering blue eyed irken's are supposed to be_ rare_, I'm confused as to why this would shock anyone.

**purple and red tallest was so happy to have zem as there doughtier**

That's right everyone, you read correctly, Zem is the mpreg spawn of Red and Purple, I'll leave you some brain bleach after I'm done.

Also. "DoughTier" made me laugh, who knows, maybe she's related to the Batterwitch too?

**but she was vary small for some rezone**

At this point she should've been killed or forced into servitude, I don't give a damn who her "parents" are!

**on body knows why she was born small and tiny every one thought that she'll never become tallest but red and purple didn't believe**

I'VE SOLVED THIS MIND BOGGLING MYSTERY!

IRKENS ARE NATURALLY NOT TALL!

Also, why would they WANT Zem to become Tallest? This story makes no sense.

**them a couple years later zem got bigger and she became a big sister too and her Favorited little brother PJ (purple Jr) became best friends with her**

Yep, another Mpreg baby, because that's very realistic.

Also "Purple Jr" wow we should hire Zem to be official baby namer she's so creative!

**( i hope you like zem's back ground story)**

Oh we ALL enjoyed it didn't we?

Well that is Zem's backstory, I'm actually disappointed there were no holes.


End file.
